Ladies...my life just keeps getting better I swear!!~ I woke this morning feeling really good (meds wise), only to come to my cell phone to a message that my 48 year old cousin Mary, suffered a massive stroke last night. She is on life support. I went to see her this morning, and whispered in her ear, to squeeze my hand if she knew who I was....you dont know how bad I cried....when she did just that. This afternoon, the nurologist woke her from sedation a bit, to see if she would follow some directions, and she did to some extent. they are giving us a 50/50 percent chance right now that she will recover. THAT...I have a PROBLEM with!!~ I even told them that. I also asked them NOT to talk in front of her like that....because on the off chance that she "is" understanding...she is not going to want to hear things like this or she will give up. I know too much about dealing with strokes, with the family I care for now who have them, and their differences..... She will Make it. I have it on good authority. I have prayed to God, and asked him for yet another miracle in my life...because she is not only my cousin, but when i was in my teens....she was also my mother. The only real child shes had is my brother michael, and he is a mess right now. I explained that shes got a long road ahead of her, to try and prepare him fro whats to come. Now..... onto my support part. She has never been able to have any other children, accept one, and she lost a baby girl from being stabbed at 25 weeks along by a stranger....and I cant get into that much more. I have decided, that I want to make her, the baby girl, that she never got to raise. I was there when she was born, and have pictures of her. I have spoken with her Husband Charlie, and asked what he thought of me making her a reborn, and he is all for it. He says that especially coming from me, that Mary would be very Happy. As I am working on this beautiful angel.... I want all of you to think and pray for Mary, and send them thoughts to me.....I want us all to gang up in prayer....she needs us, and I am going to need you, because this baby, is in rememberance of a baby I held in my arms, and that passed away before her mother even got to see her sweet little face. This one is going to be a hard one for me to do.....but for me, it is a gift, that I can give her to thank her for all that she has done for me, and to "give" her the baby girl "in rememberance" that she so very much deserves. I want to get her done in the next couple of weeks, because I want Mary to have her "gift in her arms" just like any one of us mothers would want from a long stent in the hospital. I dont want her to have bad memories....I want nothing but good. This little baby will be her therapy baby. When she leaves the hospital....she will be leaving with a baby :) I hope this makes sense. Thank you all for reading this and praying with me. I am so going to need it. Through my tears, I will make Little Maya Elizabeth ....come to life :)

Oh Tina, I am crying as I type this....

I will continue to pray for you and your family that things will improve for you and your cousin makes a complete recovery. Little Maya will be the most treasured gift that will heal wounds you all share.

My little boy died in my arms just after he was born prematurely at 24 weeks and when I held my memorial reborn baby for the first time, it was like part of the hole in my heart had been filled up a little and I felt such peace. I know your cousin will feel the same when she holds her little Maya

What a remarkable person you are

Thank youKym... I know exactly how you feel, because my hole has been filled with my baby boy anthony. I so hope that this little baby will help with mary (moms) healing, and bond us even closer than we are now. I just hope I can stand watching yet another close family member go through this hell they call stroke

My thoughts and prayers are with you all at this terrible time. I think the baby will be so precious and such a beautiful thing for you to do. You are such a beautiful, caring lady. God bless you all.
Barb

Just wanted to add, that when I had a brain tumor removed in 1996, I can clearly remember, even though I was out of it and intabated myself, that she was there....right next to my side, and she pinned an angle to my hospital gown....when I woke up, and saw it there...I thought it may have been a dream....but when I saw her a couple days after recovery.... she asked if I still had the little angel she sent me to surgery. She told me she put a little bit of herself in it, so that I would be protected. I still have this pin, and I will always no matter what happens have a piece of her with me. Thats another reason why I want to make her this little angel baby..... My way, of making sure, that she has a piece of me with her every step of the way in her recovery, and long after.

I hope everything works out for your family, and what a very special person you are.......this little Maya will be so loved........

Right behind and with you all the way Tina, there should be more people in the world like you.

I wish there were ten clones of me....so I could be everywhere at once taking care of the people I love most in this world

Tina, praying for her speedy recovery and for you, as you make this little one for her!
Hugs
Terri

Will be praying for a speedy recovery and sending tons of positive energy to you all.

I am praying for you and yourloved ones, many prayers are going up!!

it's SERMON TIME!!~
I have now ceased my crying.....my hurt, and fears, have now turned to anger!!!
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Tina Bloomfield I know....these doctors up on their high horses, and their statistics.... I swear, they must read them from somewhere...because they have NOT YET MET ME or my DETERMINATION!!~ I know..I know..They have to tell us these things, because their doctorate degree tells them so..... BUT I have something they dont have!!~ I have God...first and foremost, I also have the knowledge....they think they have, and Ive not gone to school for it. Iv'e LIVED IT!!~ Every day for the last 4 years with my father in law, and Mark. They told us all the same thing with my two boys, and to date....we have proved them all wrong!!~ This so called nurologist...was telling us about Mary's brain, and I could see from the ct scan just how bad....bad is, and may get worse....that is. in my eyes....before things turn around. He was telling Marys Husband....that "IF" she makes any kind of recovery....that she will need assistance for the rest of her life. ok...so NOT DONE YET!!~ lemme think.....my ears are burning!! ok... Then he proceeds to aks us....which hand she used?.... the right hand of course. Ok the left side of the brain runs the right.... BUT!!~ He is telling us that Mary will NOT be able to feed herself.... ok... I agree to some extent. ONLY at first.... Just like Ive done with Mark.....she CAN relearn...to use the left hand. so what if she needs a cane...so long as she can walk.... EVERY SINGLE THING HE THREW AT US TONIGHT...... I came back with....she can and will.....learn how to use the right side of her brain. Mark, has...and Im not saying that, it will happen. IF she gets better, you better BET on me being on her team!!~I don't think Charlie ( her hubby) knew what to think, of everything I was saying....that was until the doctor left......He told me he was PROUD of me for speaking up....that he didnt know exaclty up until that very moment...just what I do...for the people I love. If Mary comes home....I dont care what shape she is in.....the first year is going to be very hard....I told him that. All Mary is going to want to do is sleep..... I say LET HER!!~ It gives her precious time for her brain to heal....which it will given time. I even went so far to tell this doctor...he may know statistics....but I know what MY GOD can do!!~ He was getting such an attitude....with me, and then after a few minutes...he quit looking at me completely...and just kept telling charlie the same things. I dont care!!~ Ive done this twice before....Ive made a LOT of doctors mad...but you know what?? Ive also taken my dad, and mark right back to these very same doctors....and made them eat their words. I do not pretend, that she will be 100%...nor do I think ahead of time, that I know she will be..... I just know, what I do now, and for the last 4 years.....has been practice!!~ She will...if she makes it, have me by her side....cheering her on...making her mad even sometimes...BUT. In the end, my hope is to get her where she can know that she is still Mary, that she is still a person...not a statistic. I love her...and I would do this for anyone in my family. I probably wont be doing the majority of caring for her because my hands are full....but every spare chance I get....I will hold her hand.....and let her know that Im there for her, and will take each step as she does, when she does, and how she does AMEN!!~ whew!!~ thanks for reading this. It's been a tough week....but I know that with all of you out there praying.......I will be able to remain strong in my faith. PS.... I also told this doctor, and her hubbie, that her recovery...will depend oh the people who surround her with positivity...not statistics, and I will not let anyone talk that kind of garbage in fron of her. She is off on what we would call a very long journey to recovery...but what is a day, a week, or even a year to a stroke patient??? A MIRACLE THATS WHAT!!~ so so sorry...but I just had to share this with you ladies. Im mad...and im not taking anyones guff LOL Pss...I do NOT give up easily...it so not in my natire...and a new set of doctors are about to figure that out LOL

Tina, you can come hold my hand any time! You remind me of my sister... LOL! You set them straight!

I sure will.... she is in really bad shape right now. she is having brain swelling that is very concerning to them, and may have to tonight put a tube into her brain to monitor the pressures. If thay cannot get it under control....they say the will have to remove the left side of her skull...so the brain can expan, because it is pressing on her brain stem. This is a very hard time for us, especially me, but ive done this before....and I wont just let the doctors treat her like a statistic. she is a person first and foremost, and should be treated with dignity and respect, as they would have if it were one of their family members...or even themselves going through this horrific thing. I have enough knowledge to know how serious thisis....and getting her through the first weeks are the most important to keep her stable until she is able to breathe on her own, without difficulty. She IS moving her right side....purposefully, when she is super sedated, she cannot follow dierections, but When im in the room...she knows.... she has squeezed my hand when ive asked her too, and she also broke the tie down from her wrist tonight, and started kicking her blankets off...as if she wanted me to take her with me. This is giving me a glimmer of hope. I will stand by what I see, and feel right now, and she cannot speak for herself....so I will be the one to do it for her, because Iknow what she would do if it were me :)

Please keep us informed so we can keep praying for you all....
Hugs,
Terri